In the world we live in, there is a number of possibilities we can choose from. Like a game where your choices affect what the ending will be. The only difference is that there’s no going back to the last saving point to choose another action or the possibility of resetting everything. This is why a lot of us have regrets.
Regrets are the result of comparison.
We compare our current lives to a life we could have had if only we made a different decision. We often blame ourselves to what we believe are our mistakes; decisions we made that we wish we could reverse. Most of these regrets surround education, careers, romance, self-improvement and so on – the central issues in our lives that usually have long lasting consequences.
Although most of use think of regret as something negative, it’s not all bad. It plays a vital role in helping us make future decisions so as not to make the same mistake again, thus helping us understand life and changes the way we view future opportunities.
How are we affected by them?
However, holding on to regrets, going over and over them, formulating continuous “what ifs” in our minds, we begin to destroy ourselves believing that we have failed in accomplishing a fruitful life. Because of this, we end up entering into a deeper cycle of regret, psychological distress and physical illness. Until we let go of our regrets, we don’t allow ourselves to fully-recover from the ill-effects of and so we don’t fully re-engage in life.
What can we do?
The only thing that truly solves this is moving on. However, this involves what opportunities we have available to us to make changes. We need to actively do something that will change whatever was affected – it might be that we can reverse a previous decision and undo the regret, or we can make a new and better move.
Most reasons are due to something we weren’t able to achieve so we must let go. If there is no opportunity to go back to change things then accepting this and changing our goals allows us to move on. However, after accepting it, we must never stop finding something new – a new goal that will help us take a new step in life.
Changing the way we view our regrets and learning to accept them can help us eradicate the negative effects they can have in our lives.
We can therefore harness experiences from our regrets and lead a better future.